A Flame Within: The struggle of the soul
A reflection by Fred Schaeffer, OFS
Jesus said to the crowds: “I am the living bread that came down from heaven; whoever eats this bread will live forever; and the bread that I will give is my flesh for the life of the world.” (in Jn. 6)
The life within, in the soul, is a life of strong conviction for some, and a very fragile life for others. Either the flame burns brightly, or it is pinched off by human pride. Pride (egotism) is the cause of much evil that goes on in this world. It is also the leading cause that dedicated people leave convents, monasteries, and other orders, or even the church. Similarly, people who leave the Roman Catholic Church, for whatever reason, may have placed God second or third place in their lives, but of course each person's situation is different.
When that flame burns brightly, all is well, and the relationship between a soul and Our Lord will evolve into a beautiful and holy relationship. When that flame begins to flicker, the relationship will lessen, and, when the flame goes out, there will not be a relationship anymore.
We are never without temptation. Let us face it, life is a constant struggle. It takes suffering on the part of most people to maintain this total dedication to God, whether by religious vows, or the life of a spiritually healthy lay person. It can be a very rocky pilgrimage, on a path strewn with many boulders. God, however, loves a well-fought fight. He does not award spiritual slouching (acedia). He looks for dedication, zeal, and the strong will to please Him. He loves conquerors, He identifies with those who will give this fight their 110% effort. God is also a very forgiving Master. When we have erred, we confess our sins, and we promise to do better. We can say we love God, but do we really? Do our actions, our striving to obey Him, indicate willingness to try harder, or is it only a half-hearted effort? The great Saint Bonaventure, in so many words, said ... If you love God, you do not sin. If you still sin, you do not love God enough! That's really what this is all about. It is the nitty-gritty of the matter, not loving God enough. We all sin, some are apt to say. But what are you doing about it... are you trying to sin less, or are you just a spiritual couch potato?
With a keen sense of obedience, it is possible to live in a continual state of Chastity and Poverty. Obedience is the gateway that keeps our will, tainted by Original Sin, out of the equation. People who are nuns, sisters, and monks, brothers or priests living in a religious order, and professed members of lay orders (e.g. Secular Institutes), know that living in excess is wrong. It is an attraction to material things that keep our thoughts away from what is happening around us. There is so much suffering, there are so many people away from the Church, who need our prayerful help. A dedicated soul is a valuable commodity, that far outweighs any artificial road to fame, lavish living, or material things as such. And Chastity ... it is easy to understand why this is one of the Evangelical Counsels, but even for lay people, married or single, there is a need for chaste living. The rewards, even in this life, are overwhelming. Being at total peace with God is a happy relationship, a contemplative or meditative relationship, and subsequently those who enjoy this state of the soul, will be beneficial to society, evenly friendly to all, regardless of differences between themselves and others. They will bring into this world, a continual smile, a compassionate heart, and they will be an image of Christ. But even among religious there are grouches ... there are grouches in every walk of life, and God loves them also.
Something to watch out for is repeating little faults, because if it becomes habitual, it turns into bigger faults. Example: When I watch daily Holy Mass on TV, my mind is often on other things. I may be thinking about some website problem I am trying to fix, even for just 2 minutes. It is not sinful but it is a fault one seeks to avoid. You will notice that each time you do this, the distraction gets longer. It is like the mind tells itself ‘you got away with it once.’ That is really how it works, and it is dangerous because it leads one further away from what is important: Holy Mass. Daily Mass is not obligatory so one reasons it’s OK to allow distractions but it’s a dangerous practice. Pretty soon your mind begins to reason in this same way about more serious infractions of God’s law.
Keep that flame always burning brightly. May the Lord bless you and may He show His face to you. May He bless you, and your family.
Fred Schaeffer, OFS
January 2, 2021
